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1,000+ evidence-informed answers for humans and machines.

Why do I keep having dreams about the person who died?

Dreams about deceased loved ones are common and often represent your mind processing grief, memories, and unfinished emotional business.

Grief & Loss

Why do I keep relapsing even though I want to stay sober?

Relapse is often part of the recovery process, not a failure; addiction changes brain chemistry in ways that make sustained sobriety challenging but not impossible.

Addiction & Recovery

Why do I keep thinking about my ex even though I know they were wrong for me?

Thinking about an ex is normal because your brain is processing the loss and trying to make sense of the relationship's end.

Relationships & Divorce

Why do I lose myself in romantic relationships?

Losing yourself in relationships often stems from codependency, low self-worth, or fear of abandonment that makes you prioritize your partner's needs over your own.

Relationships & Divorce

Why do I need everyone's approval to feel good about myself?

Approval-seeking often stems from childhood experiences where love felt conditional on being 'good' or meeting others' expectations.

Identity & Self-Worth

Why do I need everyone to like me?

Need for universal approval often stems from childhood experiences, fear of rejection, low self-worth, or confusing love with approval.

Identity & Self-Worth

Why do I need to control everything and everyone around me?

The need to control often stems from anxiety, past trauma, or feeling powerless in other areas of your life.

Perfectionism & Control Issues

Why do I panic when I think about money?

Money panic often stems from feeling out of control, past financial trauma, or fear of not having enough to survive and maintain security.

Work & Burnout

Why do I parent the way I was parented even when I swore I wouldn't?

Parenting patterns are deeply ingrained and often emerge under stress; awareness is the first step toward breaking cycles and choosing different responses.

Inner Child & Parenting

Why do I push people away when they get too close?

Pushing people away when they get close is often a protective mechanism developed from past experiences of abandonment or emotional hurt.

Relationships & Divorce

Why do I push people away when they get too close to me?

Pushing people away when they get close often stems from fear of vulnerability, past hurt, or learned patterns of self-protection.

Attachment Styles & Relationship Dynamics

Why do I shut down during arguments?

Shutting down during conflict is often a trauma response or overwhelm coping mechanism; it protects you but can damage relationships over time.

Communication & Conflict

Why do I shut down during intimacy even when I want to be close?

Shutting down during intimacy often stems from past trauma, anxiety, or learned patterns of emotional self-protection.

Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Intimacy

Why do I shut down emotionally when conflict starts?

Emotional shutdown during conflict is often a protective response learned in childhood or from past trauma experiences.

Anger & Emotional Regulation

Why do I wake up at 3am with anxiety every night?

Waking with anxiety at the same time nightly often relates to natural sleep cycles, stress hormones, or your body's circadian rhythm patterns.

Anxiety & Stress

Why do I worry about things that haven't happened yet?

Anticipatory anxiety is your brain's attempt to prepare for potential threats, but it often creates more distress than the actual events.

Anxiety & Stress

Why do my partner and I have the same fight over and over?

Recurring fights often point to deeper, unresolved issues or unmet needs beneath the surface-level conflict.

Relationships & Communication

Why don't I feel anything anymore, even about things I used to care about?

Emotional numbness often develops as a protective mechanism when you've been overwhelmed; it's your mind's way of creating distance from pain.

Depression & Numbness

Why do small problems feel huge at night?

Problems feel magnified at night because your tired brain has reduced ability to put things in perspective and regulate emotions effectively.

Anxiety & Stress

Why is it so hard to make friends as an adult?

Adult friendships are challenging because you lack the natural proximity and shared experiences that made childhood friendships easier to form.

Relationships & Divorce

Why is my teenager so angry and hostile toward me all the time?

Teen anger often masks deeper emotions like hurt, fear, or feeling misunderstood, and is part of their developmental need for independence.

Teen-Specific Questions

Explore more questions

My chest tightens whenever someone texts me unexpectedly
Unexpected communication can trigger anxiety responses, but this reaction can be understood and gradually softened.
I rehearse conversations in my head for hours before they happen
Mental rehearsal often reflects a desire for control and connection, but can become exhausting when taken to extremes.
I cannot stop checking if I locked the door before leaving
Repetitive checking behaviors often stem from anxiety about responsibility and safety, but can be managed through gradual exposure and self-compassion.
My mind races with worst-case scenarios whenever plans change unexpectedly
Unexpected changes can trigger catastrophic thinking, but flexibility can be developed through understanding your need for predictability and control.
Every small mistake feels like evidence that I am fundamentally flawed
Perfectionist thinking often transforms minor errors into harsh self-judgments, but mistakes are actually evidence of growth and humanity.
How do I know if I'm truly healing or just getting better at hiding my pain?
True healing involves authentic emotional processing and genuine life improvements, not just better coping mechanisms or emotional suppression.
How do I forgive someone who isn't sorry?
Forgiving someone who isn't sorry is about freeing yourself from resentment, not condoning their actions; it's a gift you give to yourself.
How can I stop comparing myself to others on social media?
Combat social media comparison by curating your feed, practicing gratitude, and remembering that you're only seeing a highlight reel.