Why do I feel guilty about setting boundaries at work?

Question

Deeper Global · Accepted Answer

Feeling guilty about setting boundaries at work is extremely common and reflects the complex dynamics between personal needs, professional expectations, and workplace culture. This guilt often stems from several sources: people-pleasing tendencies that make saying no feel selfish or wrong, fear that boundaries will be perceived as laziness or lack of commitment, worry about job security in competitive environments, or workplace cultures that normalize overwork and constant availability. Many people have internalized messages that good employees always say yes, work long hours, and prioritize work above personal needs. However, boundaries at work are not only healthy but necessary for sustainable performance and wellbeing. Without boundaries, you risk burnout, decreased productivity, and resentment that ultimately hurts both you and your work quality. Effective boundaries might include not checking emails after certain hours, taking actual lunch breaks, saying no to non-essential requests when overwhelmed, or communicating realistic timelines for projects. The key is setting boundaries professionally and consistently rather than reactively or emotionally. Start with small boundaries and gradually build confidence. Remember that boundaries often improve your work performance by helping you focus on priorities and maintain energy for important tasks. Many managers actually respect employees who communicate their limits clearly and professionally. If your workplace consistently punishes reasonable boundaries, that's a red flag about the work environment rather than a reflection of your worth as an employee. Consider that modeling healthy boundaries can also benefit your colleagues and contribute to a better workplace culture overall.