How do I stop being a people pleaser in relationships?

People pleasing in Interpersonal relationship is exhausting and often stems from deep-seated fears of rejection, abandonment, or conflict. This pattern typically develops in childhood when love felt conditional on being 'good,' accommodating, or meeting others' needs. People pleasers often sacrifice their own needs, opinions, and Personal boundaries to maintain harmony and approval, but this creates resentment and prevents authentic intimacy. The first step in changing this pattern is recognizing that people pleasing is often a survival strategy that once served you but now limits your Interpersonal relationship. Start by identifying your authentic needs, opinions, and Personal boundaries - many people pleasers have become so focused on others that they've lost touch with their own inner voice. Practice expressing small preferences or disagreements in low-stakes situations to build tolerance for potential conflict or disappointment. Learn to sit with the discomfort of others being upset with you - this is often the core fear that drives people pleasing. Remember that healthy Interpersonal relationship can handle disagreement and that people who truly care about you want to know your authentic thoughts and needs. Set small Personal boundaries and gradually increase them as you build identity development/building-confidence" class="internal-link">building confidence. Practice saying no without over-explaining or apologizing excessively. Notice the difference between being kind and being accommodating out of fear. Work on developing your sense of personal identity/building-self-worth" class="internal-link">self-respect independent of others' approval. This often requires Psychotherapy to address underlying fears and develop healthier relationship patterns. Remember that people pleasing often attracts people who are happy to take advantage of your accommodating nature, while repelling those who want genuine, reciprocal Interpersonal relationship. Authentic Interpersonal relationship require showing up as yourself, including your needs, Personal boundaries, and occasional disagreements.