What may be happening
You may swing between over-accommodating and explosive reactions when limits are tested. Guilt about disappointing children can make every rule feel cruel.
What can help
Set age-appropriate rules on sleep, screens, chores, and respectful language. Explain the why briefly—safety, health, family functioning—without long lectures. Follow through calmly; empty threats erode trust in limits. Allow feelings while holding the line: "You can be mad; the answer is still no." Protect your own downtime so parenting limits do not come from depletion. Adjust boundaries as children mature—more privacy, more negotiated rules.
When to get support
Consider professional support if symptoms persistently interfere with daily life, relationships, or safety. Seek urgent help if you are having thoughts of self-harm or feel unable to stay safe; in the U. S. , call or text 988. Seek parenting support or family therapy if boundary struggles include violence, severe defiance, or parental overwhelm affecting safety.