Why do I feel like I can't trust my own memories?
Identity & Self-Worth
Memory distrust often stems from gaslighting, trauma, or anxiety; while memory isn't perfect, your general recollections are usually reliable.
Feeling like you can't trust your own memories is deeply unsettling and can stem from several different experiences and conditions. Gaslighting - when someone consistently denies, minimizes, or distorts your experiences - is one of the most common causes of memory distrust. If you've been in Interpersonal relationship where your recollections were regularly challenged or dismissed, you might have learned to doubt your own perceptions and memories. This can happen in abusive Interpersonal relationship, dysfunctional families, or toxic work environments where your reality is consistently questioned. Psychological trauma can also affect memory formation and recall, making some memories fragmented, unclear, or emotionally charged in ways that feel confusing. Post-traumatic Psychological stress disorder can cause intrusive memories that feel very real but might be mixed with emotions and sensations from the traumatic event, making it difficult to distinguish between accurate recall and Psychological trauma responses. Anxiety disorder and Major depressive disorder can also affect memory finding identity/building-confidence" class="internal-link">confidence building by creating doubt and rumination about past events. You might replay situations obsessively, wondering if you remembered them correctly or if your emotional state is coloring your recollection. Dissociation, which can occur during stressful or traumatic experiences, can create gaps in memory or make memories feel unreal or disconnected from your sense of self. It's important to understand that while human memory isn't perfect and can be influenced by emotions, time, and other factors, your general recollections are usually reliable, especially for significant events and overall patterns of behavior. The feeling that you can't trust your memories is often more about self-doubt than actual memory problems. If you're questioning your memories because someone else is telling you they're wrong, consider whether that person might have motivations for distorting your reality. Trust your instincts about your own experiences, and consider keeping a journal to help validate your perceptions and experiences over time. If memory issues are significantly impacting your daily life, consider speaking with a mental health professional who can help you sort through these concerns.